But, it's not. And I am perfectly okay with it.(^.^)
I would be lying if I say there's no slight envious feeling of seeing friends carrying bags with big CONGRATULATION on it. It supposed to be our moment of glory.
However, at this point, I am still struggling with my dissertation. I have yet to get my result/final output and madam supervisor suggested to add ten, yes, TEN more independent variable to the network. I was dumbfounded since Oct 14 is the due date, and today is what? Today is 9th. Madam N motivated be, saying she believes/know that I can do it..and that means a lot. A LOT! Thanks~
Yesterday's class, Dr J announced that 90% of us failed MidTerm on his paper.Screw me, but I am used to such kind of news. It's perfectly normal for me to be in that majority.(it surprises me that the percentage are 90 this sem , it used to be smaller)
It didn't affect my motivation to finish my project anyway. Sometimes too much of optimism scares me.I worry that I am not worrying about anything anymore.*sigh*
"What if's" are constantly lingering in my mind. What if I did it differently back then? Would I be celebrating now, instead of struggling?...I would never know...
But, I believe the Lord Almighty have yet to teach me something in this extra two sem. (kasi senang hati sendiri..=D) I may not be aware of what it is, but I am as eager as a beaver!
Seeing happy faces of my graduating friends send comfort in me, I would be twice as happy as them next year knowing that I succeeded overcoming my weaknesses. I am going to strive harder for that day. Who could ever thought that this chacha who hated/never good/no distinct interest in maths would end up majoring in Maths for her degree? I don't. Not even the faintest idea.
Moving and bouncing up is the only way left when you hit rock bottom...Eh, I haven't hit rock bottom la..The challenges are still bear-able so far.*grins**And I'm tired of citing the origin of this image..huh..vi.sualize.us (actually somewhere else, but it was added in visualizeus..some sort of medium for image lovers) is the source of every pic here, except when stated else.
